Pangloss says, "Well we can only widen our arms in gladness and welcome
all of you back to our big show."
stay . o O ( that means we're live )
Pangloss greets you benificently and presses a small gift into your
palm, smiling so that the zygomatic muscles (CHEEKS!) are verily straining!
Pangloss says, "We have what is referred to in the biz as a "treat"
for all of you this evening. First may we comment on the fineness of
your vestments, why did you all plan to wear velvet and in such good
state? Or was it by happenstance?"
stay . o O ( now they know what possessed me to appear
)
Striated_Guest teleports in.
Pangloss says, "Oh welcome."
sit
Pangloss says, "We are inwardly swooning and nearly diarrheaic in
anticipation of the big show, practically bursting at the seams with
love for each of you!"
Striated_Guest presses gently the bum to the chair.
good boy.
Pangloss says, "This evening our exquisite guest is name of stay,
fine forefinger of all that is to come in the realm of its ethernitical
creations. "
stay flexes fingers
Pangloss says, "For your erotic edification, stay will premiere its
new sonata entitled "Gallbladder Sonata" in the key of Ick. We hope
that you will keep your goddamned gaping facehole shut throughout its
duration."
f-f-f j-j-j
Pangloss smiles.
Pangloss says, "oh..."
........Shhhhh.........
Pangloss says, "well our 'flunkies' have not delivered the piano."
Pangloss says, "we are rather embarrassed."
sound teleports in.
Morbious waves to sound
Pangloss says, "We have heard rumors that (*&&'s memory of
a piano might be used."
........Shhhhh.........
Pangloss says, "is it in tune for you?"
stay can tell because of this insane repeating
message.
stay reaches into itys pocket
Pangloss is embarrassed at the shodshockle preparatons of this show.
........Shhhhh.........
Pangloss spreads out a velvet carpet for stay to perform its sonata.
........Shhhhh.........
stay has disconnected.
The housekeeper arrives to cart stay off to bed.
Pangloss has several tubas in the back...
Pangloss says, "Can you please keep your fucking faceholes shut? We'vre
trying to maintain a degree of professionalism."
Pangloss says, "There will be a questions period afterwards wherein
you may ask questions to stay."
stay digitally reconstructs here.
stay blushes
Pangloss says, "You may type 'ask asdkjlf' and perhaps we will pass
that onto stay as wanton gas."
Pangloss [to stay]: do you need tubas?
Pangloss [to stay]: props?
........Shhhhh.........
Pangloss says, "well for the duration of the performance..."
stay flicks the credit card and a big old big old
baby grand appears
Pangloss is agassed at the ondoings.
stay says, "Tonight is the world premiere of my new
work, The Gallbladder Sonata."
Pangloss [to stay]: perhaps you should not have made such an ordeal
about our flunkies ordering a piano.
stay says, "Now some of you who didn't take Music
2001 are wondering, well wtf is a sonata anyway."
Pangloss thinks polite applause would be appropriate.
stay says, "Sonata (sona.ta) [It. fem. pa. ppl. of
*sonare* to sound.] 1a. A musical composition for instruments as opposed
to one for voices (a *cantata*)."
Pangloss nudges the lovely audience.
Morbious claps with everyone else
stay says, "They're gagged, remember? You gagged
them."
sound gives eir best golf clap.
stay says, "Lift the gag."
stay looks the audience over.
Pangloss says, "they are most certainly not."
stay [to Pangloss]: For now.
Pangloss says, "they are just excrutably polite."
stay lets out a long sigh.
aluminum chears for stya.
stay says, "OK, back to Music 2001."
Pangloss [to stay]: do you need water?
aluminum cheers even.
Pangloss runs backstage.
stay says, "First reported use, 1694."
<clunk!>
Morbious slowly stops clapping
stay swipes the glass just as it is about to land
in the grand and thanks Pangloss nonetheless.
Goddamnnit where did you go?
stay nods to aluminum's cheers as evidence of intelligent
life out there in the aufdience.
<clunk!>
stay says, "1743 *Guardian*. He has made use of Italian
Tunes and Sonatas for promoting the Protestant Interest."
Pangloss runs back with a glass of water.
Pangloss blnks.
stay says, "1848 Dickens, *Dombey* liii I have .
. . Gone accurately through the whole of Beethovens Sonata in B."
Pangloss offers water to the audience emmbers.
Krazy_Kat is an interested Protestant
stay says, "And more to our case tonight---"
stay says, "*Transf.* *Routledges Ev. Boys
Ann.* 469 Morton had recommenced another sonata on his nasal organ."
sound washes eir hands.
stay says, "On the digital front:"
stay says, "1874 Ouseley *Musical Form* 54
The modern binary form is often but innacurately styled the sonata form."
Pangloss says, "Oh jeezus fuck."
stay says, "and finally—"
Pangloss says, "Every goddamn show!"
Pangloss says, "OUR flunkies."
stay says, "1883 *Groves Dict. Music.* III 554/I
Abstract instrumental music of the Sonata kind."
Pangloss needs a sidekick to remind us of things like...themesongs.
stay says, "that's us"
Pangloss slumps in the corner.
stay says, "extremely abstract"
Pangloss making of brutish hand gestures...no you are the guest.
stay looks over at Pangloss
stay says, "You're supposed to stay awake for
50 minutes"
stay says, "Pretend ytou're at the psychiatrist."
Pangloss holding of head, sobbing with the respiratory system for
grasping at air.
stay says, "Now for the story."
stay says, "The Gallbladder Sonata."
Pangloss [to stay]: We are embarrassed to have forgotten to make a
theme song
(top)
